5 Ways to Prevent a Breakup Before it Happens
One of the hardest parts of being in love is the point where things start falling apart. The cracks start small, like a hurt feeling here or a missed date there. The issues then become bigger, such as significant arguments and not being able to agree on anything. Resentment will rise, and hope will fall. Couples start to drift apart, and the love that once flourished begins to dwindle. Sound familiar? So how do you prevent a breakup before it happens. It takes a lot to make a relationship work, review the 5 ways to keep your relationship strong.
What follows is a nightmare that no one ever wants to face – the eventual breakup. The pain and anguish people experience during a separation can be severe and emotionally draining, the English language has no description for it. If all this sounds familiar, know that it’s not the end of everything, and you can still hit the brakes on breaking up.
Here are five proven ways on how to prevent relationship doomsday and prevent a breakup before it happens.
Evaluate Your Relationship
Before you start trying to save your relationship, you have to decide if it’s worth fighting for. If you want prevent a breakup before it happens first ask yourself what you want out of the relationship and what you’re getting from it. People stay in relationships because it is a two-way street, and they get something in return. A bond is worth keeping if it’s healthy.
A healthy relationship makes you feel fantastic and lifts your spirits. It must have the following:
Honesty is key. You and your partner must believe that you have the best intent for each other in all that you do. You are comfortable with your partner’s independence, and you’ll never hide anything from one another.
If one member of the relationship is not forthcoming about their whereabouts, starts going out alone with a new group of friends from work or the gym, no longer responds to texts or phone messages with their usual speed, or seems reticent when you’re together, it should be discussed before trust is irrevocably broken. If one partner feels shut out of the other’s life, trust is eroded because the damaged partner feels they are not the other person’s primary concern. Allowing resentment to fester often creates a wound that cannot be healed.
There are no alpha dogs in the relationship, and both of you stand on equal footing when it comes to decisions.
Consider whether one partner does more of the household work than the other, or shoulders more financial stress. There is bound to be give and take on tasks and responsibilities, but having frequent, open communication and allowing the possibility of new roles keeps resentment from growing out of control. Pitching in to assist your partner during their time of need should be appreciated and reciprocated whenever possible. Discussing each person’s role in the relationship is important and should be done openly, with the partner’s goals and desires for a full and fulfilling life valued, respected, and sought by both partners.
Opinions, beliefs, and feelings are never trampled on in a relationship where both partners respect each other. Don’t treat your partner like crap, and never accept that kind of treatment thrown your way. Respect for one another reaches through all aspects of your lives together, from the way you speak to one another to the way you treat the others belongings, the credit you give your partner for their contributions to the relationship, and whether you actually listen and really take into account your partner’s thoughts and comments on important issues. If one partner feels their contribution or opinion is less important and often derided as dumb or silly, the hurt will grow and affect other aspects of the relationship.
Being kind, showing support in times of need, and caring for your partner are the significant elements of compassion in a relationship. Extending that compassion to your partner’s extended family and friends, regardless of how they treat you, should be tempered with much communication, so both partners understand the sacrifice involved. Compassion also means caring for the other partner’s mental health and ensuring they feel appreciated and understood for their contributions to the relationship.
You and your partner own up to your mistakes and don’t blame each other when things go wrong. Both of you understand that your words and actions are your responsibility.
If your relationship has all the above and more, pull out all the stops to save it! On the flip side, you should also watch out for signs of an unhealthy relationship, such as betrayal, quilting, jealousy, and manipulation. The last thing you need is a dishonest partner that you need to run a background check on just to make sure you’re safe. If any of these and more are present in your relationship, consider embracing the impending breakout. It will do you good.
Open and Honest Communication
Communication is more than talking: it is critical to lasting relationships. It is understanding each other and being able to talk about anything, both good and bad. Relationships end when there’s no constructive communication between couples. They make unnecessary assumptions that lead to trust issues and paranoid behavior. There’s a good reason why the term “let’s talk about it” is so popular – it works. Proper communication brings understanding, which is a crucial tool for fixing broken relationships.
Stop and Take a Moment to Listen
Communication is a two-way street. A considerable part of it is focusing and listening to the message, not only “hearing” what your partner said. Listening and hearing are not the same, and frustrations often arise when one partner only hears what he/she wants to, but doesn’t listen. Patience and understanding are what make a good listener, and you can learn a lot about your partner when you open your mind and listen.
A good exercise in healthy communication is to repeat your partner’s concerns in your own words to ensure you’re understanding the message they are trying to send. Consider whether your partner has held the issue inside and why you may be difficult to approach sensitive topics. Can you change your behavior, perhaps setting aside time to discuss concerns with your partner on a regular basis?
Don’t Let Problems Fester and Grow Big
When problems come (and they will), don’t sweep them under the rug and ignore them. Talk about your issues as soon as they arrive so you and your partner can address them while they’re still fresh. Even little problems left unresolved can grow into a massive pile-up of old issues.
Be the one who’s open to change, and tell your partner what you will do to improve the issues with your relationship. Allow your partner to hold you accountable without insisting on the same for them unless they volunteer. You will be showing your partner that you’re open to constructive criticism and are dedicated to preserving the relationship, even helping it to thrive. By doing so, your partner is sure to be motivated to do the same.
Look for the Spark that Started the Flame
You and your partner wouldn’t be a couple if it weren’t for the spark that grew into a flame, engulfing both your hearts. Go out on more date nights, but change it up. If you love movies, look for a classic drive-in instead of going to the cinema. Try to eat at restaurants or have a few drinks at places you haven’t tried before. Look for the fun and quirky ones. Add spice to your sex life by educating yourself on games for the bedroom. Look for the “small somethings” that made you fall in love with your partner in the first place.
Conclusion, Prevent a Breakup Before it Happens
Your relationship won’t end unless you and your partner let it wither, or both have your hearts set on finishing it. If you’re in a healthy relationship, do everything you can to maintain the status quo. If there have been lingering issues and things aren’t working out, have an honest talk with your partner on the best course of action. Sometimes, time away from one another can be all you need.